Field guide to the APOCALYPSE by Meghann Marco

Field guide to the APOCALYPSE by Meghann Marco

Author:Meghann Marco
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon Spotlight Entertainment


He sounds like a sort of a jerk. Sticking people with smallpox….

Plasma is the liquid portion of the blood that contains dissolved substances such as glucose, antibodies, etc., and carries the red and white blood cells throughout the body.

Hot person.

Hot whoever.

See the previous chapter.

Or brains. Zombies like brains.

the modern girl’s guide to looting

—ELAINE BENES (JULIA LOUIS-DREYFUS), SEINFELD

Technology, particularly in the pharmaceutical industry, has made some important advances in the last century. If civilization falls, there are certain items (medicinal or recreational) that we gals are going to want to stock up on.

Birth Control: I don’t know about you, but I do not want to be pregnant when all the doctors are dead and the backup generators at the hospital are out of fuel. Birth control is key. Stock up. Be Elaine, grab cases. And don’t give me that crap about repopulating the species. We’ve had our day. Let the cockroaches see if they can do any better.

Painkillers: This is a good idea not only for your own personal use, but in case Courtney Love shows up. You will be able to trade painkillers for whatever you need. Just back a truck up to the pharmacy. But whatever you do, don’t trade her your painkillers for her last album.

Contact Lenses: Glasses suck. Grab all the boxes that match your prescription. Get a lot of solution, too. This stash has to last for a while.

Tampons: Highly absorbent cotton with a flushable applicator does not grow on trees. Do you really want to go back to the days when “on the rag” meant something literal? Load up!

In addition to a stop at the pharmacy, you should also stock up on luxury items that you can use for bartering once they become scarce. Be wise: Hoard things you know will be worth something.

Chocolate: Chocolate is the yummiest thing ever, so people are going to miss it. If you have it all, you are Willy Wonka and everyone else is an Oompa Loompa.

Cigarettes: Just because there are none left doesn’t mean people won’t be addicted. Some people never really break their addiction to cigarettes no matter how long they go without one. Grab all the nicotine gum, too.

Batteries: There may not be electricity, so batteries are going to be worth more than their weight in gold. Store up as many of these as possible.

Guns: Guns are useful to you as currency, but also as protection for the rest of your loot. If word gets out that you have all this stuff, some people are going to show up and try to take it. You need to be able to defend yourself. It’s also a good idea to keep it on the DL that you’re so well equipped.

Ammo: The guns won’t do you any good if you don’t have anything to load them with, silly.

Lipstick: Lipstick is the only product that does better during a recession than in times of economic growth. The theory is that instead of buying things they really want, like new 5.1 speakers and HDTVs, women buy lipstick.



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